/UN/compromisingSeptember 30, 2019
24EverJanuary 31, 2020
This was originally posted as a rant on FB. I dunno why I didn’t post this on my blog to begin with?! I received comments from a lot of folks felling the same way. I’m glad I am not alone. I got one negative (indirect) response – but i’m not gonna give any more commentary/thought to that.
Anywho… what I had said was:
My battle with the (increasing) bulge makes me tired. I make me tired. Nothing works. WW. Noom. Keto. Etc. Everything works. WW. Noom. Keto. Etc. The problem isn’t the ‘thing’. The problem…? It’s me! It’s my stinkin’ thinkin’. Literally!
Peep my day…
- Upon waking: I will do better with my eating and movement and water intake today! Yea! Let’s get it!
- As I continue laying in bed dreading getting out from under the warm covers: what will I eat for breakfast. And lunch. And snacks. 🙄
- As I brush my teeth: today is definitely a soup day. I have some WW no points soup in the freezer. SCORE!
- As I pack my lunch: I should use this leftover chicken breast in the soup. Oh. And maybe some rice. Or noodles. 🙄
- As I head for the door: did I put cheese sticks along with some nuts in my lunch bag? I should take these 1 pt crackers. With. Jalapeño Chicken Salad (which I have zero idea what wretched ingredients are in that, but it tastes delicious so…)
- As I’m driving: I should go to the gym after work. Glad I have workout junk in the (literal) trunk.
- As I sit in traffic: I should stop and get a breakfast burrito. I didn’t think abt what to do about breakfast. Plus I will be working out later so… (I almost never get it. But I think about it).
- As I continue to sit in traffic: this coffee is not that good. I should stop at Starbucks. I could also get a breakfast sandwich. (I almost never do it. But I think about it).
- As I continue to sit in traffic: I should go to the gym during my lunch hour and get it out of the way. But then I’ll be stinky and sweaty. (As if I’m doing enough to be stinky and sweaty afterward).
- As I get to work: I will eat this banana and drink this water and behave. Yes! Ima do this!
- A few hours into work: I should go grab XXX for lunch instead of this soup. It will prob taste funny after being frozen anyway.
- Lunchtime: I don’t want to drive anymore than I have to (excuse to not go to gym during lunch but also stopped me from getting bad food).
- A few hours after lunch: I’m too tired to go to the gym after work. But ima push through and go! Yes! Slay sis. (Yes I fall myself sis. Sometimes Queen too.)
- About two hours before I am off work: I should stop at XX and get something (read: bad food) for my boring drive home. (Note: I ALWAYS have an apple in my lunch bag and do not need to get anything!)
- About an hour before getting off work (when I usually put on gym clothes to increase my chances of actually going): … I can just go tomorrow. I’m tired. It’s cold. It’s sunny. It’s raining. I’m black.
- Heading to the door after work: ima go (to the gym). I will just dress there.
- In the car bumping my workout playlist to get hype: YEA! I got this! I’m going dude! Get movin Queen!!!
- About an hour into my commute when I am narrowly exiting the city of angels: 🤬
- As I pass the exit to my gym: I tired. And frustrated (with traffic) and just wanna go home! I will go tomorrow. (TOMORROW NEVER COMES!!!)
- As I near my house: text from hubby “I’m stopping at the gym”. Show off! 🙄 he makes me sick (not really. He inspires me. Just not enough to actually make it to the gym!)
- As I enter my house: I should just change and go. Yea. Ima do that.
- As I look at the top of the stairs from the bottom of the stairs: duuuuude. I am so tired. I will go tomorrow. (TOMORROW NEVER COMES!!!)
- Chillin at home: picking random stuff out of the fridge and pantry and tossing it in my mouth without a care. Mind you I am not supposed to be eating after 6pm. But this “one thing” won’t hurt. (I say the ones thing’ comment prob 6x). 🙄
- Bed time. I’m wide awake. And amazingly not tired: YAY! Martin is on for several hours!!! But no. I should go to bed. But first. Let me get in this one game of solitaire since ppl are being slow on Words With Friends. (I end up going to bed super late considering I get up at 4:30am).
- Next morning: REPEAT!
Im being funny. But this ain’t funny. At all. I have got to get off this ridiculous cycle. I’m only slightly exaggerating the sequence events (borderline not exaggerating at all). And I’m not fixing my mouth to say ‘in 2020’ nothing! Because this needs attention TODAY!!! And there is nothing to do but to do it. I need more water. I need to eat like my life depends on it (cause … IT DOES). And I need to be active! It’s not rocket science.
Anyway. Grr. I’m in a mood. Lol. (I’m always saying I have nothing to blog about and then I write this long crazy screenplay thesis smh). I’m grouchy. But. Ima lick this nonsense!